It couldn’t please me smore for you to bring these Cabaret-inspired treats round to my house!
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Meine Damen und Herren, Mesdames et Messieurs, Ladies annnnd Gentlemen. For our third Cabaret-themed recipe (the others being Mein Herring and Tomorrow Belongs to Meatballs) we present to you … It Couldn’t Please Me Smore!
It’s inspired by the song It Couldn’t Please Me More, sung by two old people. The old guy brings the old lady a pineapple. And apparently, that’s enough to cue a song.
If you brought me diamonds,
If you brought me pearls,
If you brought me roses
Like some other gents
Might bring to other girls,
It couldn’t please me more
Than the gift I see;
A pineapple for me.
And frankly, that’s about as much as I’m going to dwell on that. Because S’mores are WAY more interesting.
Before moving to the U.S., I’d only heard of S’mores. Like most people who have never eaten one, I was prone to repeatedly asking “what IS that again…?” After I had my first authentic bonfire-cooked S’more – I was hooked! The ingredients are very simple: graham crackers (sort of like digestive biscuits if you’re in the U.K. – but not really – probably because graham crackers have more fat or sugar or cocaine or something that makes them WAY better), plus melted marshmallows and chocolate.
Here’s how it’s done. You get one graham cracker layer, and place the chocolate onto it. You place your marshmallows onto a marshmallow-toasting-fork, and place it into the camp fire, bonfire, or similar. Then JUST at the point where it’s about to fall off the fork, you scrape it off with another graham cracker onto the chocolate. So the ooey gooey marshmallow and melting chocolate are sandwiched between two layers of graham cracker. Healthy? No. But completely awesome? Oh yes.
Since my family’s initiation into the world of S’mores we have made them pretty much every time we have a bonfire. However, with this recipe I’m presenting a way to get all that amazing flavor and texture but without even going outside! It involves those same three ingredients, and one more – butter. So of course it’s going to be good.
Melt the butter – I use a microwave. Crush up some graham crackers into crumbs, and mix them into the butter (by the way, if you’re not from the U.S. they are pronounced “gram” crackers). Place six muffin liners into a muffin pan (I love using silicone ones, especially in colors from the German flag), then spread about three-quarters of the mixture evenly between the cups.
Bake in a preheated oven for 5 minutes, then add a layer of chocolate chips and mini marshmallows. Sprinkle over the remaining cracker mixture, then bake for another 5 minutes.
Remove them from the oven and switch it to broil (or use an overhead grill). Sprinkle the remaining marshmallows onto each cup. Place them under the heat and watch carefully – remove them as soon as they start to turn too dark!
With all the cooking completed, you have a VERY tricky decision to make. To eat now, or to eat later?
Eat them now, and you’ll need a spoon. They’re ooey, gooey, sticky, and crumbly, and you’re going to end up quite messy – just like proper S’mores.
Eat them later, and they’ll just about hold together in one piece. They’ll be less ooey and gooey, but still sticky and crumbly, and you’re going to end up quite messy – just like proper S’mores.
The decision is yours. Just don’t bring me a damn pineapple.